Thursday, January 3, 2013

The Bar is Back in Business...

I think my favorite setting of all time is always going to be a bar. It doesn't matter what the storyline is, the sheer ambiance of a bar just fits. In some cases, (I'm thinking specifically of McKinloch's in my newest series), even a good old fashioned pub is the perfect place to hang out with my characters. That said, some of you might remember one bar in particular that exists only in my imagination, and in the wildest fantasies of a LOT of my readers.

Yep, I'm talking about the Phoenix Rising.

I've had a lot of emails since the first book in the Phoenix Trilogy released back in 2009. (Whoops, did I just let the cat out of the bag?) Most of you want to know where the hell the bar really is and whether or not you can plan a trip. I've even had some locals wondering if they don't have the scoop on where this place really is.

Truthfully, the Phoenix only exists in my head and on paper. If you haven't yet, pick up a copy of the first book. It re-released in 2012 with my new publisher, Etopia Press. I can promise anyone who reads it a gritty, realistic, and sometimes erotically animalistic journey. And I hope that all of you new to the bar and its cast of characters will fall in love with not only Jessa and Connor, who own the first book, but also with our friendly neighborhood bartender Alex.

Which brings me to the point of this post. When I said the bar is back in business, I wasn't kidding. After a LOT of drama, a lot of planning, and a whole lot of writing, I'm psyched to announce that the second book in the Trilogy, Phoenix Burning, is in production. We've gone through edits and while I'm still waiting on the edge of my seat for cover art, I'm really excited at how the final product has turned out.

Just like the first book, my readers are going to find that there's not just an erotic side to this story. There's something just a little dark too. Except that it isn't just dark. It's a story about the light and the dark sides of human emotion and how they affect us throughout our lives. It's about the choices we make and how those choices affect not only our lives but the lives of everyone we meet.

But that's enough of a teaser for the moment. There's going to be more to come. I promise! And you might want to know why a Trilogy and not another series? Honestly? I've just always wanted to write a Trilogy.



And if you missed out on your introduction to the bar where anything goes and hedonistic pleasure is encouraged...

Pick it up here!

Monday, December 31, 2012

So You THINK You Want to Know What the Forefathers Would've Said???

I think it's safe to say that we're all just a tad weary of hearing the political commentators rip each other's throats out regarding things like gun control and fiscal responsibility. What caught my attention the other night though, was a buxom redhead screeching at the top of her lungs that the founding fathers would NEVER have condoned the use of automatic weapons. They would have NEVER approved this, or they would have NEVER... Of course she was cut off by someone else and then the "discussion" dissolved into a yelling match where nobody could understand anything anyone else was saying anyway.

Of course what stuck with me was the moaning and groaning this woman was doing about wishing she could get advice from the great minds that shaped our Constitution... Really? Let me ask you again, are you SURE?

I don't think it takes a seance or any kind of time machine to get a pretty accurate picture of what our founding fathers would have said about current events today IF you were foolish enough to ask them. First of all, men like Washington, Jefferson, and Franklin would have been incensed at the idea of a woman voicing her opinion on a political topic. So I'm guessing their first reponse would have been "SHUT UP!"

Another thing, these guys were white, land owning males. They would have told the female commentator to shut up only long enough for them to process the notion that the American public had elected a black man to the office of the President. Once they managed to wrap their minds around that, they would have gone out and bought up as many automatic weapons as they could lay their hands on.

These guys LOVED weapons. They would have been THRILLED at the idea of owning something that could lay waste to their opponents. We're talking about guys who had just come through a bloody war for independence from the British crown. They had seen horrendous carnage on battlefields where soldiers suffered from conditions that our modern minds cannot possibly comprehend. You might make a brief argument that the great minds who formed the Constitution were tired of war and wanted to lay down their arms and value life, but you'd probably be wrong. These were the same guys that came up with the Second Amendment. The right to bear arms. What does this mean exactly?

Our forefathers knew that an armed populace is an empowered one. They wanted the right to own weapons so that they could stand up to tyranny if it took root in their government once again. These men might have been tired of bloody fighting. But you can be damn sure they considered owning the biggest stick the best form of war prevention.

Now, before you go burning my books in effigy--My point is simply this...

We cannot look back and whine and moan about what our founding fathers, or what the writers of the Constitution might have thought because even if it were possible to ask them you'd never get the answer you wanted. They TOLD us what they thought. They valued men. Specifically white, land owning men. They wanted guns. They wanted their privacy. They wanted the right to practice their own religion. (Which started out with a mostly puritanical framework) They wanted to say whatever they wanted about whoever they wanted to. And really, they hated the concept of a federal government anyway. Doesn't anyone remember what a high value they placed on State's Rights?



More so, we shouldn't WANT to go ask them what they think. What matters is that WE remember where we came from, and that we've evolved, and what that evolution has cost us. Technology has given us incredible luxuries, power, and the fearful responsibilities that go along with it. But sometimes we must take our priviledged heads out of our priviledged asses and remember that giving away the freedoms guaranteed by that musty old document is NEVER a wise thing to do. Governments are a lot like teenagers. Give them an inch, and they'll not only take a mile, they'll use that first inch to tie you up and leave you in the dust. It is up to the people, not the feds, and certainly not the media machine--to determine what is right for our nation.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

The Best Stocking Stuffer EVER!



Looking for something in YOUR stocking? How about a holiday romance that is a promising first installment of a great new series?

As always, I LOVE to hear from my readers. This book is a slight deviation from my norm, which is always just a little scary. Still, I can't wait to hear what everyone thinks of my new fave family...the McKinlochs.

About the book
Genre: Contemporary; Holidays
Length: Novella
Series: Clan McKinloch

Everything has gone downhill for Ashton since the hot summer night she spent with a military man she hardly knew. Her career is in a shambles, her dreams of traveling abroad are impossible, and her love life is in the toilet. Worse, one of her coworkers has decided she’s the perfect girl for him. Too bad her heart is fixed on the guy she kissed beneath the fireworks on the Fourth of July.

Trip McKinloch has never been the favorite son. McKinlochs are supposed to settle down close to home, marry, and help run the family pub. Instead, Trip joined the Air Force, has lived overseas for years, and is in love with a woman he shared one night with during his Fourth of July leave.

When Trip goes home for the holidays he is shocked to discover that the woman he cannot forget is now working as a bartender in his family’s Pub. Worse still, Trip’s brother Gavin has a hefty crush on Ashton and a grudge against Trip that could spell yuletide disaster. Now Trip has to find a way to convince everyone that the footloose McKinloch has finally found the one woman who feels just like home.

An excerpt from the book
Ravenous hordes of people crowded the vendor tents set up on the Arch grounds. Whether spurred by the introduction of Dr. Pepper and hot dogs at the 1904 World’s Fair or a citywide cultural preference, St. Louisans took their food very seriously. Tantalizing smells wafted through the sultry night air, and the boom of the first round of fireworks drowned out the cacophony of voices. What was left of the lawn had been crushed to yellow fuzz beneath the flip-flops of fairgoers. 

Ashton wished she had a clothespin for her nose. The scent of Pappy’s Smokehouse BBQ was more than her frail willpower could take. She’d been determined not to overindulge this Fourth of July. She’d gained almost five pounds eating Ted Drewes Frozen Yogurt and Gus’s Pretzels during last year’s Fair St. Louis. 

I am not hungry. I am not hungry. 

A family of four carrying waffle cones filled with melting chocolate ice cream passed her by. Ash kept striding resolutely away from the food in search of her friends. Luce and their usual crew were supposed to have grabbed the perfect vantage point on the steps overlooking the river. Her friend had texted Ash a picture of their spot near the center railing. She would have already joined them had she not needed to take a desperate trip to the porta johns set up on the other side of the Arch. 

An instrumental patriotic medley filled the air as the fireworks got underway. Ash slowed to a stop. She couldn’t resist watching the brilliant colors sparkle through the sky over the river. The rockets were shot from a fleet of six barges in the central canal of the Mississippi River below. 

The faint odor of burned gunpowder triggered memories of the sparklers, jumping jacks, and Roman candles Ash and her father had always lit off to celebrate the Fourth. She tucked a stray curl behind her ear and rubbed her sweaty palms against her denim skirt. Even dressed in a tank top with her long hair up in a ponytail, she felt grimy and overheated after a day at the fair. Luckily the coconut-scented sunscreen she constantly slathered over her pale skin to protect her “redheaded” complexion kept her smelling tolerable. 

A scuffle broke out to her left. “Hey, dickhead, watch where you’re stepping.” 

Ash attempted a hasty step backward, but she stumbled into a throng of strange men. All were on the large side with close-cropped hair. They were most likely military men from the air base across the river. The first guy grabbed the second one and shoved him in her direction. The impact sent her sprawling. 

“What’s your problem?” The guy who’d accidentally run her over didn’t seem concerned that she was collateral damage. He was too distracted by whoever had pushed him. 

The ground was hard beneath Ash’s rump. She tried to scramble to her feet, but someone stomped her hand. “Ow!” The blow brought tears to her eyes. 

“Stand down, Airman.” A commanding baritone sliced through the fracas. “You’re trampling this poor lady to death. If you can’t behave, I’ll ship your ass back to the base before curfew. Is that clear?” 

“Yessir. Crystal clear, sir.” 

A hand reached down and plucked Ash off the ground. It was warm and firm with a gentle grip that promised the owner knew how to handle a woman. Her nerves sang from her fingers all the way to her toes. She felt like a schoolgirl who’d just discovered the difference between girls and boys. 

“Are you all right?” The impromptu rescuer led her a slight distance from the crowd of airmen. “Some of us military types forget that not everyone is trying to stab us in the back.” 

“I’m fine, really.” Ash stared up at the tall, broad-shouldered man in khaki cargo shorts and a plain gray T-shirt. It was too dim on the lawn to see what color his eyes were, although his short hair was dark. Was it possible to tell by someone’s aura whether or not they were hot? Because this guy’s aura was screaming gorgeous. 

Gorgeous, provocative, seductive, alluring--how many other words can I come up with for yummy? 

“Are you out here by yourself, ma’am?” He hadn’t let go of her hand and was now scanning the people milling about as if he was determined to find somewhere to put her. 

She had to swallow a few times before her voice would work. “I’m meeting my friends by the steps.” 

“Your boyfriend shouldn’t let you walk around the fair alone, ma’am. It’s dark, and there are a thousand lowlifes skulking around out here.” 

“I don’t have a boyfriend at the moment.” Ash couldn’t help it. She laughed. “And skulking lowlifes? Really?” 

“Sorry, was that a little too dramatic?” Even in the reflected light of the fireworks, she could see the smile on his face. His features were bold, especially his strong jawline. “My name is Trip, by the way.” 

“Well that’s ironic.” She wondered who’d given him the nickname and why. Surely that wasn’t his real name. “I’m Ashton.” 

“Nice to meet you, Ashton.” 

He brought her fingers up to his lips in a gesture that made the bottom drop out of her stomach. The delicate sensation of his lips brushing over her skin sent tendrils of warmth licking silkily over her entire body. She’d never been attracted to someone like this. Never. 

He kept hold of her fingers as if reluctant to let go. “Can I walk you over to find your friends?” 

He smelled good. In an aromatic world of spicy food and flocks of people, how could she possibly pick out his scent? Oh, but she had. It was amazing. Sandalwood, mint, and something utterly male, it had lingered below her radar until she tried to grab a breath in order to speak. 

Trip had asked her something, and she still hadn’t answered. He was going to think she was an idiot. Forcing her brain to function, she hoped she wouldn’t come off sounding too eager. “You’re more than welcome to come with me. My friend Luce promised she grabbed a great spot to watch from. You can join us if you’d like.” 

The offer had seemed like a good one, in theory. Ashton’s heart sank when she realized she was taking this hot specimen of manliness to meet a hot specimen of femininity. Once Trip met Luce, he’d instantly forget Ash. 

Trip set a leisurely pace, heading down the hill and away from the thickest of the crowd that littered the lawn with blankets and picnic baskets. “Are you from around here, Ashton?” 

“I live in Soulard.” Ash paused when he did to watch a particularly bright flash of blue explode into burning white stars that sprinkled the sky. 

In the light of the explosion, she could see his teeth flash in a smile. “So practically right down the street then.” 

“What about you? You bossed those testosterone-loaded partiers like a pro. So I’m assuming you’re military something or another.” Ash wondered if it would be better or worse for him to be from St. Louis, stationed nearby, or just passing through. 

He chuckled, reaching up and rubbing a hand across his short hair. “Funny how that works, actually. I’m not even stationed over at the base, and I don’t have a clue who those guys were.” 

“And they listened to you anyway? That’s sort of bizarre.” Ash could have launched into an entire conversation about preconditioned responses, but she refrained. There was no need to make this guy think she was some kind of freak. 

“Honestly, they’re conditioned to follow orders. I’m an air force captain, so I’m conditioned to give orders.” He shrugged. “Its just habit.” 

Ash couldn’t hide her fascination. “So basically the training you guys receive makes it possible for anyone with authority to assume command. That way, if there’s an emergency, you don’t have to go through all that proving crap just to give a few basic orders and get something done quick.” 

He gave her a strange look. He probably thought she was a total geek. Ash sighed. Why did guys always want some giggling, vapid beauty queen who said her fondest wish for humanity was “whirled peas”? 

“Are you in psychology or something?” Trip asked. 

Here it was. The inevitable brush-off. “Actually, I’m an office manager for a dentist. People are really interesting to me. Sorry. I didn’t mean to talk your ear off.” 

“No, I like it,” he said. 

Something undeniably sad touched his face. Ash wished she could see more clearly, but the erratic flashes from the overhead fireworks weren’t enough to see detail. He seemed almost wistful. 

Trip lifted her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a real two-sided conversation about something other than ordnance, who’s sleeping with whom, or why so-and-so didn’t do what he or she said they would.” 

Ashton’s insides clenched at the contact. Who was this guy, and how had she managed to find him in the madness of Fair St. Louis? She tried to find something she could say that would encourage him to keep talking without making her sound pushy. “That sounds as if it might get tedious after a while.” 

“It is. I’m home on leave from Afghanistan. My air force unit has been deployed for the last nineteen months.” He gazed at the sky, the vivid display of rockets reflected off the metallic Arch. “I’ve only been home ten days, but I leave again tomorrow.” 

Ash forgot her petty war against calories and fretting about being less attractive than Luce. This nice guy was about to leave for an uncertain world Ash could not possibly imagine. Compared to his, her problems didn’t even register on the scale. 

He glanced back down, and one corner of his mouth lifted in a wry smile. “I’m sorry. It doesn’t do any good to be a big wet blanket. I’ve had a great time while I’ve been on leave, and that’s what matters.” 

“What have you done for ten days?” Ash was determined to be upbeat and positive. “What do airmen do when they’re on vacation?” 

She couldn’t miss the pure mischief on his face. Not even in the near dark. “Depends on the airman.” 

“What have you done?” 

“I spent a lot of time with my family.” He wandered a little farther across the grounds. She could see the outline of the steps crowded with fairgoers. 

It wouldn’t be long, and their oddly private walk would be over. Ash was sad at the prospect. “Was there a woman waiting to spend time with you while you were home?” 

“Nope. I’m single.” He stopped and turned to face her. “That’s what you were getting at, right?” 

She could’ve happily sunk right into the hillside. Instead, she scrambled for a pithy comeback. “I was, actually. Kind of like when you asked why my boyfriend let me wander around the fair by myself.” 

“Guilty as charged.” His gaze felt like a physical caress. “Can’t slip anything past you, can I?” 

“I hope not.” 

He paused, and she could feel his gaze lingering over every inch of her. “Your hair is really beautiful.” 

Her breath stuck in her throat as he twirled a stray curl around his index finger. Nobody ever called her hair beautiful. It had to be the funky light. Her hair was six shades of red. Not auburn, not cinnamon, just plain in-your-face red. Worse, it was curly. She’d been Little Orphan Annie every Halloween for ten years because it was the only costume her poor dad could come up with. 

“Can I kiss you, Ashton?” Trip took her other hand. “I’m being pushier than I normally would be, but I’m leaving tomorrow. You’re...different...in a way I didn’t think existed. Everything lately has been so heavy.” He stopped talking as if he didn’t want to think about the overwhelming portions of his life. Seconds later, his face eased into a warm smile. “You make me think life hasn’t really gone to hell. I’d like to have that memory to take with me when I go back.” 

Oh. My. God. 

“You want to remember me?” She was melting inside, and it had nothing to do with the hot, muggy air. 

“God, yes.” He drew her arms upward until her hands were locked around his neck and she was stretched full length against his hard body. “In fact, I’d like to have a lot more to remember. But a kiss is a good start, and I’ll take whatever you’re comfortable giving.” 

She squeaked when his mouth descended to hers. It was like sinking into velvet. He tasted spicy and male, like his scent, only better. He kissed like a master, something that should’ve scared her but didn’t. Somehow the shadowy specters of his past lovers didn’t matter any more than her lack of experience. 

His tongue slid along the seam of her lips, begging entrance. She opened, and he pushed inside her mouth. He didn’t dominate. He coaxed, drawing her deeper. She moved against him, eagerly taking what he gave before sliding her tongue into his mouth in return. 

It was hot and carnal, the raw sensation of two people exploring the scent and taste of each other. The kiss left her squirming with an ache between her legs. She arched up on tiptoes and felt a bulge between them. Instead of making her back off, it excited her. She’d never felt so wanted, so powerful and feminine all at once. It was heady, and she wanted more. 

He finally broke away, his breath ragged. “I think I need to stop before I can’t.” 

“Don’t.” She nipped his lower lip. “Stop, I mean. You said you wanted more. I want to give it to you.” 

Trip groaned and pressed his forehead against hers. “Darlin’, don’t say things like that. I’m leaving tomorrow, and I might never come back. You’re not the kind of girl who goes around having one-night stands. I can tell that from one kiss.” 

“You’re right, normally, but even if I never see you again--I won’t regret this.” She looked up at a purple-and-red burst of shooting stars. How could it be wrong when it felt so right? “I think this is probably the most romantic moment of my whole life. Why stop now?”

Copyright © Kaitlin Maitland

Buy This Book

Monday, September 17, 2012

Fast Fall Freefall

You're probably thinking- "Wow! With a title like that, this post is sure to be something totally awesome." Uh, not to burst your bubble, but I'm just a big fan of aliteration. Seriously, Fast Fall Freefall. Say it five times fast. I dare you.

However, that doesn't mean this post won't be awesome. It is. I think. Although I'm making it up as I go so I've got no idea WHAT it's going to be... Oh wait! I've got it! Let's talk about something that really counts as we step into fall and realize that wham! the holidays are right around the effing corner.

Mental health. Everyone's fave topic.

Really though, I'm not kidding. How many of us get into fall and start feeling stressed out? Stress doesn't have to be classic either. You don't need to be one of those whiners who moans and groans and pops Xanax. Sometimes stress sufferers are quiet. They plug along in the background until they just drop from exhaustion. That's not a good thing people!

Stress causes all kinds of icky health problems. So don't let yourself be overwhelmed. Take a step back and recognize those signs that you maybe need a day to yourself. You know what they are. We all feel it creeping up. Maybe you snap at people when they ask you something mundane. Maybe you're having trouble sleeping because your mind is racing around trying to anticipate every little aspect of the day to come. Maybe you're ready to crawl into a corner, curl into the fetal position and just hide until global warming finishes up and we all turn into toast points. Whatever!

So here's a quick tip- its OKAY to call in sick or take a personal day and just lay in bed. I'm not joking here. If you find yourself on the brink, DO it! Don't wait for the men in white. Crawl back into bed after the kids go to school, or your significant other leaves, or whatever, just crawl back in bed and watch soap operas, or Oprah, or play video games if that's what you love. Hell, spend the day doing Farmville or one of those bubble popping games. (Of course you might want to hide your new high scores from your work friends if you're playing hooky) Point is, take that day and use it to recharge your mental batteries. We need that time to literally do nothing important. That helps to reset the brain, the emotional state, and even the heart in some cases.

Now, once you get reset? Then its time to build some decompression time into your daily or weekly schedule. You need to discover what works for you and utilize it. Don't give me that "I don't have time." crap either. You either make time or you go nuts, pull your hair out, and have a heart attack. It's that simple. Spending some quality time with yourself, doing something that you love, that's a huge part of mental health.

We don't all do the same things. Me? For those of you who know me, I'm a horse fanatic with a capital F-A-N-A-T-I-C. I don't deny myself those hours spent with Mercy. They're important to me. Even on days I don't ride, its good to go out and groom her, wash that massive tail, give her some beauty treatments, and just be silent. Nobody can share a comfortable silence like Mercy Me. I'm telling you, she's therapy GOLD!

That's not the only thing I do to protect my mental health though. It's a full time occupation, I promise. I have two kids, a few part time gigs, my writing, a husband, and grad school. I NEED to keep myself from losing my mind. It's imperative. So I'm careful about what I focus on. Sometimes I deliberately procrastinate. I know that sounds bad, but occasionally its okay to say, "Hey, I really cannot deal with this right now. So I'm going to make a date to do it tomorrow. And right now, I'm going to go sit in front of the Playstation and veg." And that is OKAY! Let the house get a little dirty, let the laundry pile up, make yourself a list of things that have to get done and prioritize. Do what really cannot be put off and then go relax for awhile. If your schedule is so tight you cannot afford to procrastinate, make it an hour, a half hour, fifteen effing minutes! Something! I'm not kidding here, whatever task you think HAS to be done? It'll get done in half the time and at double the quality if you just take a break and then get to it.


So as our fast fall freefall approaches, don't neglect yourself. Don't neglect your emotional state just to project an image of someone who has it all together. And all those people out there who seem like they DO have it together? They're pretending too, unless they've mastered the art of decompression.

Remember- you should always make time to pick up a book and read for awhile. Escape to the Extraordinary people- NOT just a catchphrase. It's a lifestyle choice. One you won't regret.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Verifiable Intelligence Is Back

Though I'm always telling people that I write more than just erotic romance novels, there really isn't that much in the way of published evidence to support that claim. So--as you might imagine--I am totally thrilled that my Romantic Suspense novel, Verifiable Intelligence, is going to be re-released with my friends at Etopia Press on August 10.

Truth be told, I LOVE this book. It was so much fun to write. There's so much action I think it could even keep an ADD sufferer busy enough to be happy. Really, I know you might think I'm just saying that, but the action is a non-stop ride from page one all the way until the ending.

It's not one of my longer novels. I think it sits at just under 50K words. But it totally lacks fluff. From the first moment you are sucked into the world of an assassin for hire named Dayne Castille. Definitely not your typical girl. She carries a really nice Sig Sauer P226 .357 in her holster and she's not afraid to blow stuff up when the situation calls for it.

In the past, I've had a lot of readers ask me if I do any kind of research when it comes to the weapons I use in my books. The answer is yes. I do. And actually, there isn't a handgun or rifle picked up by a character in this book that I don't have first hand experience with.

Dayne's sidearm is the same model I target shoot with. And while I've never participated in a car chase (Admit it- haven't you secretly wanted to try?) the truck that Dayne drives is the model that used to sit in my driveway. And Jace's Ducati? Go check out my Facebook page and you'll find me sitting on the yellow Monster.

See, I like to know firsthand what I'm talking about. Not that I'm going to get in a shootout during rush hour traffic on a motorcycle. But when I tell you that he accelerated so fast that his butt almost came off the seat and the wind made his eyes water, I want to describe the real thing.

Of course, the exception to this desire for reality might be the Dragunov. A lot of people refer to this as the Dragon Sniper. And yeah, through some really odd circumstances, I own one. I must confess to a case of the chickens though. The recoil on a weapon like that is like a mule kick to the shoulder. But I'm getting there. So you watch this nifty book trailer, and I'll try to scrape together the courage to target shoot with my rifle. (As a sidenote-when using firearms please make certain you're in a safe place with someone who knows what they're doing. I'm fortunate enough to have an ex-Military gun aficionado in my household. If you don't- please contact your local shooting range and find one. Safety first!)


Saturday, July 21, 2012

My Favorite Commercial Ever

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpeoRIvnxfk

This has got to be the greatest commercial that I've seen in a long time. The horrible thing is what makes it great though. If you haven't seen it, if I haven't done the link properly (totally possible) or if you'd rather I just explain the irony-

It's a Toyota Venza ad. I could care less about the vehicle. I suppose if you like the cargo space the thing would be great. I'm more of a full size truck girl myself, but I digress.

The ad features a woman in her twenties talking about an article she saw online that said older people are becoming anti-social. She goes on to say how she's disappointed in her parents because while they've joined Facebook they only have 19 friends.

This entire monologue is punctuated by shots of her parents mountain biking through some rough terrain with a group of other people their age. Perhaps the most disturbing part is when the daughter starts muttering about puppies and talking about how she has six hundred plus FB friends and how "THIS is living." Whew! Anyone else feel just a little nervous that there are TOO many people out there who share her world view?

How frightening is it that the younger the person the less active they are? Now, I'm a rabid equestrian. I spend enough time at the barn that I could call it a non-paying part time job. I love it. I love the outdoors, I love grooming my horse, saddling up, and going for a ride. I like loading her up in the trailer (this is why I cannot own a Toyota Venza) and driving to a National Park and then taking a nice long trail ride with friends. Or, I like to load up and go to the horse show and compete against other lunatics who share my passionate drive to aim my 1280lb horse at obstacles and ask her to jump them. (This is a rush-if you have NEVER done it, you cannot possibly imagine)

Instead of being active and excited, and in constant MOTION, which is what used to make Americans such go getters, we camp out on the couch and send each other links. We have virtual friends we never communicate with in person. We don't have real personal relationships. We have online ones. We allow the time delay to take all of the discomfort from our interactions with other people. How easy is it to never get mad at someone when you can easily avoid any topic you want and never ever have to listen to or say something you think they might not like?

So, laugh at that commercial because its funny. It is. But don't BECOME it. In fact, put down the laptop and go outside. I know its probably a million degrees out, but go look at the sky, see the sun, absorb some natural vitamins, just go BE!



Friday, July 20, 2012

Mr Nobody-The Bastard Did it All!

Anyone recognize the weirdos in this picture from their childrens' books? These are the Mr. Men. You know who you don't see there? Mr. Nobody. Why? Because he's a more recent addition to the crew. Having no concrete evidence for why this is (the series started in the UK in 1971) I would like to speculate on why Mr. Nobody didn't exist back in 1971.

Ready?

It's because there was no need for Mr Nobody back in 1971. People took freakin' responsibility for the crap they did. They did not, for instance, use all of the plastic wrap in the house for some kind of weird project, throw away the container, not add it the grocery list, and then stare at their mother and say, "I don't know who did that. Nobody, I guess."

See! This is where we meet Mr. Nobody! This guy's life has to be crap! He not only takes the fall for all the bad stuff in our house, he is the ultimate scapegoat in politics, economics and religion.

Anyway, back to 1971. Or at least back to a time when average people did stupid stuff, took a step back, sighed, and said, "Yeah, that was me. I blew it. I'm sorry. It won't happen again because I've learned my lesson."

Am I delusional? Did we ever own up to our mistakes like that? I probably am. I just simply want to know, what's SO bad about making a boo boo? We all do it. Wouldn't it be awesome if we'd all just put on our big girl panties (or briefs I suppose) and just OWN it? Say yes to making mistakes because that's how we learn. And for crap's sake, when someone is trying to teach you a better way to do something, or making a suggestion, or simply offering constructive criticism, don't say- I know. Because if you DID know, you wouldn't need to learn! You'd already be doing it and we wouldn't be having this darn conversation.

In the Utopian society I wished we could live in, people would blow it all the time and instead of Mr. Nobody up there taking the fall, they'd admit they made a mistake. Then, instead of the boss, or supervisor, or co-worker, or even parent, getting mad- they'd just say, "Okay, so you won't do that again will you?" I often wonder if more people would own their mistakes if the wronged party wouldn't freak out about it. Perhaps it is the anticipation of freak out that creates the desire to blame our invisible friend. in which case this is an evil cycle and I'm out here speculating for no purpose.

Think of all the moments of cultural significant when what I like to call the Nobody Clause has been invoked. In the US we're getting closer to election time so we're hearing a lot of it. "Nobody has taken responsibility for the state of our environment." (please don't anyone get their panties in a twist over this one) "There weren't weapons of mass destruction?? Nobody told me that!"

So please, please, think before you try to deny that you've done something wrong and made a mistake. Taking responsibility requires a certain amount of courage. So if someone is trying to do the right thing and avoid invoking the nobody clause, don't chew their head off for it. Let's play nice in the sandbox and maybe, just maybe, we can make it a nicer sandbox for all involved.